Bereavement leave for miscarriage?

Wow, I was challenged today at work. I mean, I'm really struggling with this one.

I received an email from a supervisor in our organization asking if bereavement leave could be used for an employee who recently miscarried. (For those not familiar with bereavement leave, it is time off that some companies provide after the loss of a family member.) As the leave of absence administrator for the hospital, I should be able to make that call. However, where do I draw the line between my personal beliefs and how the professional organization would handle such issues?

I thought it best to forward the issue to a Director within Human Resources whom I have worked closely with in the past and think very highly of. She just called me and said, "Yes, we've been working extensively on this case... what do you think?"

What do I think? "I think this woman just lost a child..." (and should be granted time off work!!)

She continues, "So, at what point do we count that? I mean, a viable pregnancy, when a baby could be delivered, is 22 weeks..."

I hesitated, "Right, but she was pregnant, I mean, she was with child, so..."

She went on, "Right, and I have been through this myself many years ago, and while there was a recovery process after the DNC, it was mostly physical and psychological recovery..." Um, did you not mourn your loss?

I urged, "I agree, so while she could use her sick leave and paid time off, she DID just lose a child, right?"

I fear I'm not being strong enough here.

She said, "Well, I'll pull you back in on this, we'll see what some other folks think too." Valid point. I get that. I mean, at the end of the day we do have a business to run. But part of me also does not understand why this is even a question!

She is going to set up a meeting on Monday with the hospital's chaplain. Maybe God's light can shine through this situation afterall.

I'll keep you posted.

The fed-up-with-it-all FLU season

This flu season may just kill me.

Not because I get the flu, no... because of the debacle that is flu shots. There is a short supply—-everywhere. I work in the Employee Health department of the hospital and get to share in the joy of answering everyone's questions about the flu shots: do you have the flu shot... what about H1N1... when will you get more... can I get it... why can't I get it... BUT... what if I get it elsewhere... should I wear a mask... do you have the flu shot? do you have the flu shot? do you have the flu shot? ARRRRRRGHGHGHGHHHH!!!!

Mr. Employee, when I tell you that you can’t have the shot, it’s not that I don’t like you or that I’m lying to you, it’s because a) you are not a direct healthcare provider, b) you are too old/don’t qualify for the nasal mist (which is all we have right now), or c) we’re out of the injectible, which you have asked specifically for. Yes, please go call whatever higher power you feel will do any good—-we don’t have what you are looking for. I'm very sorry.

Don’t be rude.
Don’t yell at us.
Don’t storm out.
Don’t have your mom call (I'm not kidding.)

Simply shrug your shoulders, thank me for answering your question (and please do not ask if you can call here everyday for an update), and kindly walk away. Please watch your email for the MASS communication that will inevitably go out when more of the flu vaccine becomes available for our employees. (sigh)


All the pestering and dumb questions... believe me when I tell you that I really, truly DO love my job. It's just the people that are hard to deal with sometimes. Ha!

Happy 2nd Anniversary to US!!

Two years, already!? Wow!! September 29, 2007 was one of the best days of my life so far... and each new day with John gets better and better.

This year we continued our tradition of going out for sushi on the night of our anniversary. This year we went to Sushi Den, one of the best sushi places in Denver; and I had not been to it before. The best sushi I ever had was in Kauai on our honeymoon, and John compared the quality of that to Sushi Den (at Sushi Basho prices--a small sushi place in downtown Littleton; good for the price!!) Anyway, he wasn't kidding, this was G-O-O-O-O-O-D. Mmm, mmm, MMM!! The server was awesome and brought us ice cream afterwards with a candle to wish on for our anniversary. Very sweet, and did I mention YUMMY?!

After dinner we continued the trend of spending our anniversary night in the same suite we spent our wedding night in at the Hilton Garden Inn in Highlands Ranch. The guy at the check-in desk was very sweet and said, "Well, I wasn't here last year when you two came, but I've heard about you... Happy Anniversary Mr. and Mrs. Stone." So cute!!

This year John surprised me with chocolate covered strawberries. And the hotel threw in champagne, too! John doesn't like champagne, so we brought it home to be used at a different occassion (anyone celebrating anything??)

The day after our anniversary we both take off work and spend the day together. That way, we can sleep in and enjoy a relaxing day. Usually we take advantage of the free breakfast at the hotel, but this year we went to NoNo's Cafe. We got there just in time to get breakfast--close call! My sister used to work at this restaurant and it's always fun to see the owners (her old bosses). They both came out to say "Hi" and are so sweet (both from New Orleans, still have their suthun' accents.)

After breakfast we headed West in hopes of getting a glimpse of the fall colors that Colorado does so well. Turns out it was a bit early for this, as we saw mostly green and yellows; there was very little orange or red. However, when we got into Evergreen and saw this, the drive was worth it:



The skies were beautiful, it was a very mild day; perfect weather to spend together.

We figured out that we were really close to the casinos, and while neither of us are gamblers, our old neighbors and good friends both work for a casino. "Let's surprise them!!" We found our way there and eventually met up with them. They both walked us around and showed off their place (he is Director of Compliance (kind of a big deal) and she is in charge of the wait staff, gift shop, and recently the new hotel opening.) It was fun to see them in their element and so proud of where they work. I lost a few bucks on a slot machine (not as much fun as they look), and John took a turn at a poker table... I think he prefers the video poker we play at restaurants with fake money. I'm just sayin'!!

We left the casino in time to make it home, change into our Rockies gear and make an evening game at Coors Field to watch our boys win. :) All in all, it was a GREAT day, fun anniversary, and good start to the third year.

Go Rockies!!

It's always exciting to be a sports fan in Denver. And lately I've shown my spirit in person. The other day (9/2/09) the hospital got a bunch of free tickets to the Rockies game. The seats were up in the top deck, but if you've ever been to Coors Field, you know that there isn't a bad seat in the house. With last minute notice, I called my friend Talena whose husband works some nights during the week, and mine was doing the same. Girls night at the ball park!



We didn't make it in time for the first pitch (and I miss the National Anthem more than I ever hear it), but we did get there before the hot dogs were out, and the beer was still cold. And I of course bought peanuts off the street vendors--how can you not?



The Rockies won, I learned that we acquired Jason Giambi (former Yankee) the night before, and he got MVP of the game. YAHOO!!

Bears 27 | Broncos 17

Here are the facts:

1. The Chicago Bears came to Denver for a pre-season game.


2. John is a Bears fan. Correction: John is a BIG Bears fan.

3. Abby is a Broncos fan. A loyal Broncos fan.

4. Abby is the best wife in the world for buying her hubby tickets to this game.

5. Denver had the lead at one point (er, three points).

6. John's team won (and I was a good sport.)


We had a blast and have a few great pictures to show for it. I can love my team and still be a good sport... maybe we'll even have a good season in spite of our loss on the home turf.

Collectible or sellable?

In preparation for yet another garage sale, I am going through every box in the basement that I can get my hands on--some are too heavy to move, some covered in spider webs. I cut through the tape and tear open each box--as if it's Christmas!!--to see if its contents are garage sale worthy (not hard to qualify for, it seems.) However, most of these boxes are John's or rather, his Mom's, treasures. My dear husband has held on to so much of his Mom's things for so long and is just now starting to let go--difficult, I'm sure. I think the turning point came when we moved and he pulled it all out of the crawl space after 8 years of being in there (and a number of years stored up in Illinois before that!)

I am torn though... He has stated himself that we are not honoring his mother's memory simply by having her things in boxes in the basement. But is it disrespectful to sell some items? He emailed his sisters about his mom's spoon collection that used to adorn the walls of his dining room in the old house (that is, before I moved in and began redecorating) and they didn't bite.

He is partial to an old dish set that he asked I not "just give away," so I have found my way to a website that specializes in replacing pieces and parts to discontinued (or old) collections and dish sets, china, silver, etc. I have found that this website will set a cup and saucer set of China for $9.99 and gladly buy the same pieces from me for $0.50. <--NOT a typo. Hmmm... Craigs List here I come!!

But still, I'm torn. My own mom convninced me not to sell the few Hummels we have (a collectible), but the one Precious Moments piece will likely be on Craigs List soon. I have decided to hold on to the China set until furhter notice, but will try and get top dollar for the other dish set. While one small set of dishes will go in the garage sale, I have decided to keep a few other treasures:



They are darling!! My sister celebrated her daughter's fifth birthday last year with a tea party, and went all over town (so I'm told) looking for old cups and saucers. Who knew I had these right under my nose?! I think that if I have a daughter someday, maybe I could do the same... and how special would it be to use her grandma's pieces!





So for now, many of these delicate items will be wrapped back up and taken back down stairs...


P.S. I have vowed (as every other woman in my family has done) to not have another garage sale... Well, at least not for a few years. ;) You will not see neon signs with arrows pointing my direction next summer. Mark my words!!!

He's FREE!!! Look at him go!!

When we bought our new house, there was no fence. We knew that this was just one more expense in buying our new home, but one that had to be made. John got quotes from three different companies: $7,000, $6,000, $3,500. NO WAY. Surely we can do it for cheaper. Granted, if we had shelled out that much money, it would have been done faster and with much less work and stress on us... but there is a sense of pride that comes with building our own fence.

Yes, I hammered a few nails myself (the rest we did with the nail gun!) My dear old dad helped set the posts, and started the rails and pickets with John. I helped finish the pickets (finished one side solo, thankyouverymuch!) and nailing the mesh to the back split rail.

So with one VERY tired husband, we now also have one VERY happy puppy dog...

"Let me out, Mom!"


...And there he gooooooooooooooooeessss!!!!


At first he didn't know what to do. Before the fence was done, our poor pooch was sent outside on a 15 ft. cable tied to a stake in the ground. It broke my heart every time. When we finished the fence and let him go free, I had the cables all wrapped up so he wouldn't see them. I think he was a little lost, though. :)


All I had to do was yell, "Wrigley! RUN!!" And he was off...




He circled the yard, charging and darting every direction. He stopped to smell E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G, which was cute to watch.


Then he wore himself out pretty quickly:


He's a great dog though; I'm glad we could do this for him. We never expected to get Wrigley in the first place, but I do love having him for a pet... He's really part of the family, now actually!


(If you're lucky to hear it, John does a great impression of what Wrigley is thinking all the time!!)

OH WAIT!! I suppose I should show a picture of the finished product, eh?